S&M as a genetic trait?

Greetings all,

I have stated many times that I believe that qualities of dominance or submissiveness are natural traits, which is to say they are based in our genetics. This is the only explanation which would seem to explain why so many females seem to be submissive in nature, while so many men seem to be dominant. Of course, social conditioning also plays an important role. These natural tendencies can be both surprised or encouraged depending on environment. But nature is nature.

Segue: Of course there are dominant females and submissive males. In a large enough population such things are bound to occur. But, imo, they are the exception, not the rule.

But what about sadism and masochism? Are they also genetic, or are they learned? Recently on a post on FetLife I suggested that unlike D/s these were not so much genetic traits as learned conditions. In response, a rather intelligent girl called me to task on the matter and suggested I reconsider.

So I have been reconsidering.

I think that the classical view is that most masochists developed this trait perhaps because of a traumatic sexual experience at a young age. Perhaps they were abused as children. Perhaps they were somehow forced to perform oral sex as a young teenager. Whatever. Of course on the surface this makes no real sense, since one would expect that the reaction to such an experience would be just the opposite, i.e. anyone who was abused as child would probably reject the notion of being masochistic. However, the reality is that I have met many incredibly deep and profound pain sluts who were never abused at all in their youth. Who were never forced. They just found that they loved pain, perhaps because of the endorphins released, or perhaps because of the notion of offering themselves.

Then of course, we have to wonder about sadists. Can we say that someone became a sadist because they were abused as a child? No that doesn’t make a great deal of sense. Can we say that they became a sadist because they were not abused as a child? That makes even less sense. How does the binding between inflicting pain on another and arousal occur? Again, having spoken to many sadists many of them admit to having developed feelings very early on. I was about 13 the first time I remember fantasizing about spanking a woman. And by the time I was 15 and reading “My life and my loves” by Frank Harris for the first time (and certainly not the last!) I was already well into acknowledging that I was having these sort of feelings. Of course, it would be about 10 years before I had an opportunity to do anything about them other than jerk off! FWIW – I was not abused as a child. My parents loved me in a perfectly wonderful and normal way.

Is it possible that there is an S&M gene somewhere in our DNA? That would be a pretty wild notion. I mean, I can understand nature selecting for someone being more or less dominant, or more or less submissive, but sadistic and masochistic? If that was the case, wouldn’t there be more sadists and masochists in the population at large?

Perhaps there are.

Many women (and not a few men) seem to enjoy a wee bit of spanking on the bum during sex. Of course they don’t consider themselves masochists, they just like their sex a bit rough. Too, many men (and more than a few women) seem to enjoy spanking their partner. Is there really any difference between this and flogging, except for degree? “Love bites” are a fairly normal part of the sexual experience - is there any real difference between this and the use of clamps or pins except in the amount of pain inflicted? Some like their sex gentle as a summer rain, other prefer it with the power of a downpour, while still others want to be caught up in a hurricane of lust. Some act, different degrees.

Hmmm…

This would tend to suggest that perhaps all of us have some amount of S or M inherent in our makeup. And if that is the case it might also explain the behaviour (or rather mal-adaptive behaviour) of so many people. For if many people in the population at large have S or M natures, and never get to express them, then certainly they will find another socially acceptable way to do it. The classical example (which I have never been fully happy with) is the sadist who becomes a surgeon. I would suggest that perhaps there are examples of sadists and masochists all around us, we just haven’t been seeing them as such.

Too, perhaps this would explain why time and time again, I have seen strong and powerful women suddenly become not only submissive, but also masochistic almost overnight as I provoke their response. Once they come to realize that it is perfectly acceptable and safe to reveal their inner nature, it is quite amazing to observe the transformation. I am sure their friends would be shocked to know that she who was just yesterday an ardent feminist, a dominant force in her place of business, and a virtual dynamo of controlling energy, now wants nothing more than to belly to a man’s feet, a whip held in their teeth, and whimper their dark cravings for pain and release.

So maybe I have been wrong all these years? Maybe, like D/s, S&M is also somehow embedded in our genes, just waiting an opportunity to come out? Maybe, like D/s, each of us have this quality but to a different extent? Maybe S&M is nothing more than nature’s way to allow us to vent stress and pressure. Lots of maybes.

But it would be interesting to do some detailed research, eh?

What do you think?

Be seeing you,