Rules and Rituals

Greetings all,

In response to my post on Brainwashing one reader (Rob) asked for some more information on phrases, rituals and disciplines.

I have written in previous blog entries about the need for disciplines. I have also written about one discipline in particular (Third Person Form).

During the days of my web site, I wrote an essay on the use of Rules and Rituals within the D/s Dynamic. This was written in collaboration with Felicia. I am copying it here since I feel it would help answer Rob's question.

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Rules and Rituals in the D/s Lifestyle

By Mackenzie Cross and Felicia
Copyright © 2004
All rights reserved

A dominant/submissive lifestyle is based upon the willing transfer of power between the submissive and the dominant. Submissives are drawn to a dominant's strength, power and charisma. They respond by yielding to the dominant who, in turn, empowers them to live more fully according to their nature. The manifestation of this power dynamic is the dominant’s control of the submissive. And the most effective method of maintaining control in a way that will enhance the experience for both parties is to establish a valuable framework of rules and rituals.

Rules and rituals are long-standing tools used to control the behaviours of an individual or group. Wedding ceremonies, the armed services, funerals, club membership, family gatherings, even childbirth are all steeped in ritual. They provide structure and create a sense of belonging. They can also be a powerful reminder of who we are and help keep us in mind of our commitments, either to others or to ourselves.

In a dominant/submissive relationship, rules and rituals are used to train and focus the mind, to provide boundaries and establish an atmosphere where the submissive feels secure and cared for. They help create a safe environment in which the submissive is able to express their need to be controlled, and the dominant is able to fulfill the desire to control. The observance of rules and rituals also serves to center the submissive's concentration on service and on the dominant, while the dominant is kept in mind of their responsibility toward the submissive through monitoring and enforcement.

In addition, such a framework provides an important mechanism in the maintenance of the D/s relationship, without which it will lose its structure and eventually fall into chaos and discord.

It may be helpful to begin with some clear definitions. Rules dictate what shall or shall not be done. Rituals indicate the manner that service is to be performed or acknowledgement given.

It is important for the submissive to recognize the difference between a dominant and a bully or tyrant. It is easy for someone bigger and stronger to force their will upon another, but their underlying motivation is the distinguishing factor. The bully controls out of fear, or a deep insecurity, which demands they micro-manage another. They require obedience in order to validate themselves. Ironically, this normally leads them to being dependent on their victim. Clearly, this sort of behaviour is abuse.

On the other hand dominants are motivated by a deep desire to develop and enhance their submissives. They possess a high degree of self-confidence and self-control. And though the dominant gains great satisfaction from managing a submissive, ultimately, the submissive’s service is neither needed nor required. If the submissive chooses to leave, which is their fundamental right, the dominant will send them on their way without hindrance. The bully is incapable of responding in this manner. They will threaten, follow and, in some tragic cases, violently respond to the departure of the other. This is not the behaviour of a dominant.

It is just as important to understand the difference between a submissive and a victim. Not surprisingly, the prime differentiator is power. At one end is the victim, stripped of all power, living in fear and desperation. At the other end of the scale is the submissive, sexually charged, energized, and highly motivated through their accomplishments.

Submission is as exhilarating an exercise of power to the submissive as control is to the dominant. The fully realized submissive thrives in this state and seeks it at every turn. The responsible dominant understands the implications of this statement: Unless the state of submission is continually reinforced, the submissive will feel neglected and dissatisfied. And while the nature, number and priority of rules and rituals will vary, one thing is abundantly clear, they are essential for a healthy D/s relationship.

Rules

For some, reading erotic stories or novels with a D/s theme may be the extent of their exposure to this lifestyle. Such stories are exciting and arousing, and the submissives in them are usually required to follow certain rules designed to keep them sexually charged and remind them they are to be constantly available for sexual use. However, rules about sexuality only represent a subset of a comprehensive framework touching all aspects of daily life for those following a D/s lifestyle.

Rules will normally fit into one of two categories. The first has to do with the pleasure of the dominant, the so-called “do me” rules. The purpose of this sort of rule is simple, the dominant’s gratification. By observing these, the submissive remains focused on the dominant’s pleasure - a key component of D/s interaction.

The second category has to do with the development of the submissive. Part of the responsibility in the management of a submissive includes allowing them to overcome challenges, enhancing their abilities, and guiding them in the understanding and use of their power. These rules can be quite varied and may include appearance, physical and intellectual development, or even mannerisms.

Obviously most dominants find it much easier to create the first sort of rule. Personal gratification and the ability to arrange one’s house to one’s own satisfaction are fundamental prerogatives of a dominant. However, the responsible dominant develops a keen appreciation of both the strengths and weaknesses of a particular submissive then designs rules best suited to their individual needs.

It should be noted that the dominant is not required to explain the reasons behind setting any rules, though they may choose to do so. The submissive must trust their dominant is doing the right thing or the arrangement will not work.

How many rules are required? A great deal will depend on the desired outcome. More rules will lead to tighter control over the submissive and, for the dominant, a greater sense of power. For those who have only recently discovered their dominant nature, this ability to control can be an intoxicating seduction. After all, obedience is a primary form of power flow between the dominant and submissive. One might be tempted to drink too deeply of this elixir of power by constantly giving the submissive more rules to obey. However, nothing is free, and, as with any fine drink, there is a price to be paid for consuming too much.

In a previous article about Power Transfer (not yet published here), it was stated that with the exercise of power comes the requirement of responsibility. In this context, more rules require more monitoring. A dominant who sets rules and then does not monitor their execution is behaving in an irresponsible manner and sends mixed signals to the submissive. If a rule is important enough to set, it should be important enough to track. From the submissive’s perspective, any other behaviour would not only be confusing, but throw into doubt the trustworthiness of the dominant.

Beyond monitoring, more rules will also require more attention to punishments. When rules are broken, corrective action is required, but if broken rules are “let go” or ignored by the dominant, the submissive will feel abandoned or rejected. A responsible dominant will not only set rules, they will enforce their compliance. This may be difficult in love-based D/s relationships because it is hard to punish a loved one, but it is necessary and must not be neglected.

Remember, a submissive is not a victim. They have consensually agreed to enter the relationship, deeply motivated by their need to serve and the intoxicating attraction of power. The dominant’s administration and management of rules are a key element in allowing them to satisfy this need. To fail to provide a consistent, reasonable and appropriate set of rules is to fail in one’s responsibility to the submissive.

In general, more rules are required at the beginning of the relationship than when it has matured. Setting many rules early on allows the submissive to gain an appreciation of the character of the dominant, while simultaneously providing the dominant the opportunity to observe the submissive’s abilities. In addition, new D/s relationships are often very exciting. Rules provide a way for this excitement to be expressed.

It should be noted that submissives in training require a very tight regime of rules. The new submissive, unsure and still insecure, will find comfort in a closely enforced set of rules. They represent a safe outlet for the expression of submission. However, over time, as the strength and integrity of the individuals are revealed, the rules should be reviewed and may often be reduced, though one must be careful not to become too lax.

A well-trained submissive should already be familiar with basic rules of behaviour and feel comfortable with their submissive nature. Though they may not require as many rules as a new submissive, they will still need evaluation and development. Rules are an important part of that process.

How to Develop Rules

Rules may not be easy to follow, but they should be simple. Some examples are: You will rise when I come into the room; you will not eat until given permission; you will lock the garage door each night; you will exercise for thirty minutes each day. As rules are an expression of how the dominant wishes the submissive to behave they will tend to be as varied as the dominants who set them. It would be impossible to develop a generic list of rules to be used in the management of all submissives. However, we can provide some general guidelines for their creation and enforcement.

Be prepared:
The dominant should always have their rules ready. They are not to be made up as one goes along, although new ones can be added as needed. This may prove a challenge for the new dominant. We strongly suggest you take some time to develop a core set of rules before taking on a submissive. Also, the new dominant must be aware one cannot enforce one’s rules upon another’s submissive. “A slave cannot have two masters.” Service may be offered to another dominant, but a submissive can only yield to one person at a time.

Be consistent:
Since rules are so critical to the submissive, they should not be changed on a whim or without due notice. Rules are not to be used as a way of "toying" with a submissive. Again, the new dominant may become so seduced by giving and enforcing rules they could create conflicting conditions that cannot be resolved. Submissives should question these inconsistencies. (Though carefully, to be sure. The new dominant may not react well to having their rules questioned.) We also suggest the rules be written down to avoid confusion, and the consequences of breaking them should be known up front. Likewise, submissives must avoid trying to “read between the lines” when it comes to rules. Only well-trained or highly experienced submissives can interpret rules with any consistent success. When in doubt, a submissive should always ask for direction.

Be conscientious:
As previously mentioned, rules create a responsibility for the dominant. One must verify they are being followed and punish when they are broken, otherwise they mean nothing. Be careful of having too many rules. Submissives will often test their dominants by breaking rules to see if they are paying attention. In such situations, punishment must be harsh and swift. Failure to do so will usually be interpreted as disinterest, not tolerance, and will damage the relationship.

Rituals

There are several benefits to the establishment and performance of rituals. They reinforce the D/s relationship by allowing both the submissive and the dominant to affirm their commitment and involvement. As rituals are performed and acknowledged, the flow of power is facilitated and balance is maintained. It is the D/s equivalent of saying "I love you".

Since rituals are one of the conduits of power flow between the dominant and the submissive, lack of ritual, therefore, can act as a dam, hindering smooth interaction between the individuals. Removal of an established ritual can also act as a powerful form of punishment. A submissive may not realize just how important a simple ritual is until it is removed.

If power flow is the language of submission, then rituals become its vocabulary.

Let’s consider a ritual for serving tea. Such a ritual might entail kneeling on the dominant’s right side, holding the cup in a certain manner, dipping the head with lowered eyes and smiling with parted lips before withdrawing. While the submissive will strive to perform the ritual to perfection, the dominant may give some latitude in its execution. For example, by parting the lips more and adding a heavier breath, a signal of intense need may be expressed. By waiting an extra moment before withdrawing, a wish to speak may be communicated, or perhaps this can be done by a light touch. Alternatively, if the submissive notices the dominant is particularly tired and stressed, the ritual may be performed as quietly as possible as a signal of empathy.

Another example is a ritual of acknowledgment. While each dominant will have their own variant (crossed wrists, bowed head, etc.), the purpose of the ritual will always be the same – a requirement for the submissive to indicate they have heard a command and agree to perform it. However, by varying the speed of response and facial expression, many more things can be communicated. Body language is a well-understood form of communication, and it is of particular importance in the context of D/s rituals.

Of course, the experienced dominant learns to monitor the execution of rituals carefully in order to pick up the full set of nuances being expressed. In long-term relationships, it is expected the dominant will be able to read many things from these observations, including the submissive’s attitude and state of mind. In some cases, specific communications might be read such as a need to speak, a need to depart, bringing attention to a particular situation, and so forth.

There is another, somewhat lighter side to the performance of rituals. They can have the delightful effect of turning mundane tasks into erotic expressions. Normal, everyday activities can be enhanced by the imposition of ritual. Fetching a magazine becomes an erotic act when it is presented in a specific fashion while kneeling. Drinking wine has layers of meaning added when it is required to kiss the glass and nod before sipping. Even the simple act of eating can be lifted to an erotic experience if it is only permitted after a discrete signal from the dominant. The more complex the rituals, the more the submissive must keep focused on the dominant, which reinforces the state of submission at all times. When a well-designed ritual is performed correctly, the effect can be an amazing rush of power.

Even without overt physical stimulation, the sensation of power transfer is highly sexual in nature. This is not too surprising given that many submissives have very strong sex drives. Rituals can have the wonderful side effect of keeping the submissive in a constant state of arousal, something which an equally sexual dominant should not be adverse to.

How to Develop Rituals

The experienced dominant will appreciate the requirement for some flexibility, or interpretation, on the part of the submissive by allowing some leeway in the execution of rituals. While there may be a temptation to enforce very strict adherence to a ritual, it must be understood that this can stifle a submissive’s natural creativity and impulsiveness. Of course, much depends on what the dominant wishes to develop in the submissive’s character. But, in general, if the ritual is too rigid, the dominant should not be surprised if the submissive grows bored with its execution after awhile.

Keep in mind that if the ritual has been well designed, the submissive will feel a personal sense of accomplishment and satisfaction from the correct performance of it. This is one measure of the success of the ritual.

Here are a few guidelines for the development of rituals.

Be thoughtful:
The responsible dominant is aware of just how serious a ritual is to a submissive. They will be performed religiously. Therefore, they require much forethought and must be given with care.

Be purposeful:
Rituals can be simple or complex, discrete or demonstrative, and it will likely be necessary to have a variety of rituals for various occasions and situations or social contexts. For example, once a submissive becomes aware they have displeased their dominant, they will need to beg for punishment. (Please refer to the section on begging in the Punishment article. NB: These essays have not yet been posted on my blog) In such instances, the dominant may require a ritual designed to impress the severity of the submissive's actions upon them, such as weeping and crawling while carrying a punishment tool between the teeth. However, this would not be appropriate in a public place. Nevertheless, some immediate recognition of the situation would be required and a more discrete ritual would still allow the submissive to express remorse and need for the reconciliation of punishment without embarrassing the dominant.

Several factors must be considered when developing a ritual. Let’s use an erotic feeding ritual to examine some of the finer points.

First, it is important to remember that rituals help to train and focus the submissive's mind, prepare their body, and build their confidence while serving the dominant. They also underscore the significance of the D/s relationship and serve as a reminder of the submissive’s place in relation to the dominant. All aspects of the ritual should be designed with these things in mind. The feeding ritual, in particular, builds trust and emphasizes the fact that the dominant will care for them in all ways, even with food.

Additional items to consider:

· Position. Will the submissive be kneeling or sitting? This may be the basis of two separate rituals. Perhaps the dominant would like the submissive to kneel when they are alone at home and sit when in public at a restaurant.

· Hands. Are the hands to be crossed on the lap, behind the neck, behind the back, or resting on the tabletop? Will they be allowed to use their hands at all? A different ritual altogether may be required if the submissive is going to be hand fed.

· Legs. If kneeling, will the dominant allow thighs to touch or must they remain open? If sitting, will the submissive be permitted to cross their legs or ankles? Uncrossed legs are often a signal of openness and readiness.

· Eyes. Normally, dominants prefer a submissive’s eyes to be averted and downcast. This is a physiological anchor which keeps them in full submission.

· Lips. It is common to require a submissive’s lips be slightly parted. It’s an erotic gesture and is also used to remind them of their openness. They should stay parted except for chewing and swallowing. In general, the submissive should accept food on the tongue and close their teeth first, then the lips. Sometimes they might playfully bite on the fork and engage in a small tug of war with the dominant, a gentle flirtation.

· Sounds. The submissive may be required to ask for a bite, or, alternatively, they may be under a discipline of silence. Small sounds may be permitted as expressions of gratitude. The submissive should always be grateful for the attentions of the dominant.

· Facial expression. Many times a dominant enjoys it when a submissive expresses feelings of satisfaction with the taste of the food, their gratitude at being served, and arousal from performance of the ritual.

· Breathing. It may be helpful to let the submissive know when to inhale and exhale if there will be any restriction of movement.

· Intent. In order for the ritual to be a success, the intent and mindset of the submissive must be articulated and maintained.

Be patient:

Rituals require practice. A submissive is unlikely to perform a new ritual correctly the first time. In order to be successful, the dominant must have a clear visualization of the ritual and to correct the submissive until the movements are performed to perfection.

Summary

Rules and rituals constitute an important part of a dominant/submissive relationship. They provide the framework which sustains the service and discipline needs of the submissive as well as fulfilling the dominant’s desire for expression of power and control. While the submissive may not always be rewarded for good performance, it is important they be punished if any rules are broken.

Rituals provide the vocabulary for expression of devotion and eroticisation of the mundane. They must be crafted with care, designed with the psychology of submission and power in mind, and enforced with dedication.

A D/s relationship is a symbiosis of power flow. Bereft of rules and rituals, such a life is like music without a key, chaotic and haphazard. However, with the structure provided by carefully crafted rules and rituals which are enforced and acknowledged, a D/s life is like a symphony, beautiful and satisfying.

Consensual or Brainwashing? Part 2

Greetings all,

Is the mentoring/training process a true consensual experience, or is it in reality an insidious form of mind control via brainwashing?

Hmmm…

Let me start by saying that I do not know a great deal about brainwashing, except perhaps what I have seen in some bad movies about the cold war, and some spy thrillers which I have read. However, I do not feel I require detailed knowledge of how to brainwash someone in order to comment, because at its root, brainwashing is a non-consensual activity. What do I mean by this statement?

I suppose that the classical view of brainwashing is where someone’s perception of reality is modified in some manner so that they do and say things they ordinarily would not. I am sure we are all familiar with the scenario where a citizen of one country is captured by the enemy, and through a series of tortures and other activities is somehow persuaded to go back to their home country and assassinate the President, or perform some other dastardly deed. I do not think I really have to discuss this scenario in relation to D/s training/mentoring, since I have no desire to assassinate anyone, nor am I in the business of abducting people against their will.

However, there are other forms of brainwashing that should be considered. For example, what about the various religious cults which seem to foster all manner of strange and often maladaptive behaviours on the part of their members? From what I know of them, the participants seem quite willing to embrace the modifications which are made to their mental processes. They will give away their money, give up their families, even give up their lives, if the cult leader requires it. And do so happily and willingly.

But here again, these techniques do not map well to what I do during training and mentoring. For example, for the cult system to work, the participant must be removed from their regular environment and placed in a location where they will be surrounded by others who constantly reinforce the message of the leader. My techniques REQUIRE that the participant start actively involved in her current situation, and I ENCOURAGE her friends to question my techniques as much as they feel is appropriate. IOW – I welcome critique, rather than suppress it. Further, the cult brainwashing technique is fundamentally geared to satisfying the desires/demands of the leader. While certainly my techniques try to teach the submissive to focus on being pleasing, they also require her to be responsible and accountable for her actions. IOW – at every turn she must question if this is something she wishes to do.

So, whatever mentoring/training is, I don’t think the cult model fits. My model requires not only the willing consent of the submissive, but also must face the challenge of those around her who might be opposed to it. Further, as I mentioned in my previous post on this topic, I require that the female go through a lengthy vetting process before I will accept her into a formal relationship.

All this having been said, I do suppose there are some elements of brainwashing in some of my techniques. For example, I will teach a girl certain phrases, rituals, or disciplines which reinforce her submission and then have her repeat them over and over again. I will create scenarios where she is placed in a dilemma in how best to serve, pushing her into an unbalanced state, from which she may be more open to my ideas and suggestions. I will manipulate her emotions to make her more receptive to a new emotional state. These techniques could be viewed as a form of brainwashing I suppose.

But I prefer to call it de-programming.

By the time most females come to me they have had a lifetime of social conditioning. This conditioning has basically taught them that their inner nature is wrongful and evil. This conditioning has created a mental state which makes them fearful of their true nature. This conditioning has reinforced their belief that being female is the same as being male, that it is wrong to feel feminine, that being submissive means being weak, passive and inferior. For the deeply submissive female, our modern day Western culture and society is an open prison from which they cannot escape. They are led to believe that their sexual cravings are immoral, and that their desire to serve a dominant male is a betrayal to their gender. They are made to feel that the display of such things would have them branded as traitors and whores.

And so they have learned to cover up these desires and cravings with layers and layers of armour, and defenses which manifest themselves in many many ways. It is my task, to help them break down these barriers, see themselves for who they are, and joyfully accept their nature. I don’t think of this as brainwashing, I think of it as cleansing.

Of course, others (many others) disagree. Which is why I am always very very careful before I start a formal relationship with any girl. Not all women are deeply submissive, not all women have the maturity and sense of self to handle this journey. I need to be sure before I start that they will. Still, I sometimes make mistakes, and a girl fails to make it through the process. When that happens I feel that I have failed her, and I am despondent. Happily, that does not happen to often.

Perhaps, in the final analysis, the best case I can make against my techniques being a form of brainwashing is the references of the wonderful girls it has been my pleasure to train and/or mentor. Each and every one of them is a jewel in their own right. Each of them, even though the formal part of the relationship is over and we no longer interact as much as we once did, will speak well of me, not because I require them to do so, but because in their hearts they are grateful for the changes I have created inside of them.

And that, is the best reward of all.

Be seeing you,

Consensual or Brainwashing? Part 1

Consensual or Brainwashing?

Greetings all,

The other day I was asked if the training/mentoring of a submissive was actually consensual or perhaps a form of brainwashing.

Then just yesterday someone suggested that my writings are nothing more than a way to lure, or bait, females into the BDSM lifestyle.

While I disagree with both assertions, I feel they require a response. I welcome reasoned critiques, as I think everyone in the community should. When we are challenged, it provides us with an opportunity to re-examine our foundations and reaffirm our convictions.

Let me begin with the easier of the two questions – am I trying to lure or bait females? The easiest, and perhaps most trivial, way to respond would be simply to say that I am not. But that hardly proves anything, does it? I mean, if I WAS trying to lure innocent females into a life of depraved submission at my feet (as appealing as that sounds) I would hardly say that I was, now would I?

What I can say is that I tend to refuse more women than I accept. I can also say that before I accept a female into a formal relationship, be it training or mentoring, there is a rather lengthy vetting process which she must go through (which can last up to a year) before I am satisfied she knows what she is getting involved in. During this vetting time I try my best to dissuade her from entering into the relationship. Why? Simply because I need to make sure of her desire to do this thing. I do not like setting up a woman for failure, and if I do not give her enough time to understand what will be required of her, then there is a high probability she will fail. When a girl fails during mentoring, I feel it is a failure on my part as well.

In addition, mentoring and training are time consuming, challenging, and draining. Perhaps from the outside it seems to be all fun and roses, but the hard reality is that I am trying to take someone who is generally filled with anxieties, concerns, fears, about her sexuality and submission, and have her embrace and accept her nature. Plus, in addition to her fears, I am generally faced with the animosity of her friends and support people who will view me as evil.

Now I ask you, why in the world would I want to knowingly set myself up for such a trying experience? Again the answer is simple. It has two parts. The first is the reward, which is to say the rich satisfaction I receive in having enhanced and developed the submissive. The second is that it is my nature. I am good at what I do, and so I do it.

OTOH – if I was looking to collect girls of my own, or trying to build a harem of pleasure slaves, I would understand why someone might think my stories are intended as bait. But I am not. All mentoring/training relationships come to an end. This is one of the very first rules that any female learns from me, that the formal relationship will have a beginning and an ending.

Finally, I have to say that I can only maintain a very few of these relationships at any one time. As such, there is little point in me looking for new girls. I generally have my hands quite full.

So, on to the second question, that of brainwashing. I think it deserves its own blog entry, so I will end this one, and start a new one.

Be seeing you,

Guest Fiction - Party Favours

Greetings all,

Just a bit more fiction before I return to a couple of topic areas that have been on my mind recently. These two were written by Felicia, and by sandra. Both were inspired by my "You are..." series. I have received permission from both of them to post their words.

Enjoy.

Be seeing you,

Macknezie.
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Party Favours, Variations on a Theme of Mackenzie Cross, Second Tangent
by felicia Mansur
Copyright 2008

You are at a cocktail party, a glass of amber fire neglected in your hand. She looks over her shoulder at you, missing the latest attempt at seduction by the boys surrounding her. She smiles at them and turns away. Her hips sway under her impeccable posture as she walks towards you, her lips parted slightly, her long lashes shading dark eyes. As she turns to go up stairs she dips her head to you. In another time or place this could’ve been a bow, now it’s an invitation.

You watch her climb the stairs, her slender legs seem to go on forever. All the way from her high heels until they disappear under her short skirt. The shadow under her skirt is full of promise.

You finish your drink before following.

The bathroom door is slightly open. She’s leaning over the counter fixing her lipstick. She catches your eye smiling. She lifts her skirt just a bit, spreading her legs. Across her ass are the unmistakable welts from a cane.

You lock the door behind you. She crosses her wrists in the small of her back and closes her eyes.

You remind yourself to thank your host later.


Copyright 2008; felicia Mansur, (felicia@mansur.ca). All rights reserved. Content may not be copied or used in whole or part without written permission from the author.

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Party Favours, Variations on a Theme of Mackenzie Cross, Third Tangent
by sandra
Copyright 2008

My own cocktail party.

I spy her capturing his attention with her velvet swaying, her seductive stare behind half tilted head. She clinches his interest, swaggering up the staircase, the slow rhythmic click of her heels against naked wooden steps.

He commits to his prey, ascending until they are both hidden from where I watch. I approach the bottom step, hesitating because of what I might discover up above. His commanding silhouette illuminated by the bathroom light. Oh, the ease at which he closes that door, behind which a flood of passion erupts.

My heart drowns in my drink.
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Fiction - You are - I am

Greetings all,

Author's Forward.

For some time I have been writing a series of flashers (stories with 200 words or less) called "You are.." They are written in second-person form where the narrator is a male sadist talking to a female submissive.

Yesterday sandra (my wife) read a flasher by an author who I know quite well which was inspired by my series. This prompted sandra to write a flasher of her own, which was basically a re-telling of Felicia flasher from a different character's pov.

sandra enjoyed the experience and asked if I had any of my own flashers I could let her read. I sent her one from the abovementioned series. In the space of less than an hour she had written another.

I thought it was quite good, and asked her permission to post it on a reading list and also here. I am posting mine followed by hers since I think they work well together.

Be seeing you,

Mackenzie

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6 - You are..

Copyright 2008 Mackenzie Cross
All rights reserved

.. naked, hanging vertically, your body at a perfect right angle to the floor. Four hemp ropes hold you, two at the hips, and one each at the waist and chest. You hang motionless, hands are by your side, head bent forward, with your toes pointed downward just a few inches above the floor.

Your breathing is calm and deep.

Your flesh is criss-crossed with deep red welts. There have been strikes and screams, and much thrashing in the ropes. That was before. Now you hang exquisite and timeless, perfectly at rest. Perfectly at rest, except for the clamp.

It is a clear plastic thing, smaller than others with a more gentle bite. The last thing I did before leaving was to clip it to your clit. The squeezing pressure provokes slow waves of vibrations which you feel like the roll of distant thunder warning of an oncoming storm through the heat of a perfect summer day.

You wonder how long I shall keep you hanging.

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I am…

Copyright 2008 sandra
All rights reserved

.. a spent girl. The remains of sweat turning to cold wet specks upon my skin, cooling it there in a basement room. Limp, still bound, thoughts of the feverish frenzy which came some time before now are invading my temporary calm.

I am secured by your competence, held by your command. I am a willing thing, a wrapped gift entangled in a web of pain and pleasure. Unaware of when you shall return to attend to this womanly mass, I try to navigate through each moment when you were here, revisiting each wave of sensation you so dearly bestowed upon me.

I am still under your power, though you have left me alone here. Your ropes entwine around my limbs, a clamp burrowed deep between my thighs, holding tight onto the place of core desire. A throbbing pulse ticking like a time bomb, breathing new desires waiting to explode once again.

I am... oh please return to finish.... I am... I am... I am... I am.
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Am I dominant?

The female submissive’s path to accepting her nature may be a challenge, but at least it is manageable. What I mean is that even if she is completely unaware of her nature, there are many signals which make it easy to decipher both her nature, and its intensity. And so while her development may not be easy, at least it is possible. The female submissive displays her nature in a wide variety of rather obvious ways. In particular, the intense mental state known as “sub-fever.” A state of heightened arousal which can not be quenched solely through sexual interactions. The interesting thing about sub-fever is that it is undeniable. Even for the un-awakened submissive, once she is provoked, she knows it, even if she does not understand it.

Many females have written to me about their first experience with sub-fever, how they did not understand it, and were even fearful of it at times. But they could not ignore it. Sub-fever is not just being horny. If it did, a quick bit of the old in-out would be enough to satisfy the craving, but the fact is that sex is not enough.

So, there are more than a few indicators that allow a submissive to be identified, both to herself and to others. But what of the dominant? How does a man know if his nature is dominant? How can he discover it? How does anyone recognize it? Perhaps most importantly, how does a dominant develop his nature? Unlike submissives, who seem to generally respond well to training, most dominants have little desire to be trained, and certainly not by another dominant. It is a status thing, eh?

This problem seems to break down into two distinct topic areas: 1) Identifying someone’s dominant traits and 2) developing those traits. Of the two, I think the first is rather more of a challenge.

Before I continue I should state my personal opinion which is that the majority of males are dominant in nature, although some are more strongly (intensely) dominant than others. This is natural since the male is genetically coded to be dominant (at least imo), but some males (such as the alpha male) will obviously be more assertive in expressing his dominance.

Why then does it seem so difficult for so many submissive females to find a dominant partner? Simply put, most men find it difficult to express their natural dominance. They have been socially conditioned to believe that it is wrong and immoral to do so. There have been decades, generations, of active campaigning by the legions of Political Correctness to promote the view that men and women are interchangeable with respect to their sexuality, and interaction models. And so the males have suppressed their natural tendencies and instead sublimated it into other areas such as sports, hobbies, and mal-adaptive behaviours.

What signs are there that a fellow might be dominant? A desire to control his environment? Strongly held opinions? An ability (or desire) to assert himself to get his way? A degree of comfort in holding the reins of control? A desire to lead rather than follow? All of these are legitimate but I think that what makes the dominant stand out is how control yields a rich sense of satisfaction. It is obvious that some may be motivated to control because of fear. Fear that if they lose control the consequences will be negative. Therefore they try to control everything (also known as micro-management).

But the dominant does not fear loss of control, this is not why he seeks control. Rather, he finds within control an outlet for his nature. Simply put, it feels good. He does not need to control every little detail of a situation, it is enough to know that he can should he choose to do so.

Here I think is the basis of understanding the fundamental difference between those who abuse and those who dominate. The abuser uses control as a weapon against those he abuses. The dominant uses control as a tool to enhance and develop the environment around him. The abuser fears loss of control, the dominant does not fear it at all.

Segue: Curiously, it has been my discovery that many deeply submissive females are often labelled as “control freaks” before they are awakened to their nature. Upon reflection this is easy to understand and explain. The un-awakened submissive female uses control as a way of creating a barrier between herself and her nature. By controlling those around her, she never has to deal with her own loss of control, which is the inevitable consequence of admitting to her nature. Many (if not most) women are terrified of the loss of control which comes when they give themselves over to a dominant. They speak of an abyss, a precipice, a vast crevice of blackness. I understand. They have had to control everyone around them as a way of making sure no one controls them. What they long for in the secret heart, they have been made to fear by their social conditioning. How strange and sad.

But back to the dominant – how can a man know his nature? Perhaps the easiest way is to have an experienced submissive serve him and see how he behaves. I have seen this often enough. Some men will have no idea about what to do when a beautiful woman kneels at their feet and offers her service to them. Their reaction is often to raise the girl up and try and talk to her about “why it is demeaning and wrong for her to kneel in front of a man.” Such men are probably not dominant in nature. Others, perhaps the majority, will take sexual advantage of the situation. And why not? Sexual use is the easiest way to express dominance or submission, and few men will resist the temptation of a freely offered sexual service. Such men are, I believe, trainable. But there is one more category, those being the men who will see a kneeling girl and feel a sense of rightness about the situation and from that seek to understand it. While they may use the girl in a sexual manner, they will seek a deeper appreciation of the situation. Such men obvious candidates to be taught more of the ways of dominance and submission.

What if no experienced submissive is available? Then, sadly, it will prove much more of a challenge for the undeveloped dominant to learn of his nature. Of course, there are always books (both fictional and non-fictional), and they will help, to a point. But what is really required is a way for the male to express his domination, and that simply can not be done through a book.

Expect, perhaps, the books of Gor. But that will be for another day.

Be seeing you,

Fiction - Prelude and Fugue in slave-minor

Greetings all,

As some may have guessed I know about Gor. For those that do not, perhaps in time you shall know it as well. Certainly if you hang around here long enough you will.

I am not going to be speaking about Gor in this post, however I could not post the following short piece of fiction without some general acknowledgement for its inspiration.

I hope you will enjoy it.
---------

Prelude and Fugue in Slave-minor

© 2002-2004 Mackenzie Cross
All rights reserved.

(composed while listening to J.S. Bach’s Prelude and Fugue in Cm (BWV 847), as played by Glenn Gould.)

Prelude

The following piece uses some Gorean words. The Gorean books are a series written by John Norman. Those who have not heard of it are welcome to do their own research.

Some definitions for those unfamiliar with Gor.

Kajira – the Gorean term for slave girl
Tarn – a fantasy animal. A large bird that can be ridden. Noted for its vicious nature.


Fugue

*
Touch. His fingers trace a lazy pattern. Tension. Circles and spirals of movement and control. The rich scenting of female perfumes the air. Tension. A primitive sound escapes her throat. Touch. Release.
*
Touch.

The small alcove is lit by a single candle.

“Master?”

“Position.”

She is ready.

She shudders at the delicate touch.

His fingers trace a lazy pattern. Tension.

“Ah, Master.” A whisper, a breath, a need.

“Be still girl.”

He pushes her down with the palm of his hand. She will not be permitted the smallest control.

Now he begins a deliberate arousal.

Circles and spirals of movement and control.

“Aiiee Master! Please?”

“Be quiet, slave.”

She must be silent, yet she must scream.

His fingers follow seemingly random circular patterns over her body. She draws a ragged breath.

He spreads his hand wide and encircles her throat.

Juices flow freely between spread legs, exposing the intensity of arousal.

The rich scenting of female perfumes the air. Tension

He breathes deeply, taking further pleasure from her essence.

She yields her submission.

He notes the changes.

He leans over and rapes a long kiss from her lips. As he does this, his free hand reaches down, trailing a path between her breasts, over the fine sheen of sweat on her belly.

Her body is rigid in its tension.

Leather-clad fingers plunge through her slickness, probing her center.
“Now, kajira.”

A primitive sound escapes her throat.

Slave orgasm.

Touch. Release.

*

Touch.

He is a courier taking a brief relaxation before continuing on his mission. She is only a tavern slave. Her use came with the price of the meal.

The small alcove is lit by a single candle.

The black leather riding gloves still carry the scent of his tarn. There is no need to remove them. He will be leaving shortly.

“Master?”

“Position.”

She is stretched out beside him. He has bound her wrists above her head, chained to the wall ring. Eyes closed. He waits, observing, not touching. He notes the changes in her breathing, the rising flush on her chest.

She is ready.

He begins just above the navel. She shudders at the delicate touch.

His fingers trace a lazy pattern. Tension.

“Ah, Master”. A whisper, a breath, a need.

Her belly is taut, filled with slave heat. Her hips lift trying to press against the gloved hand, yearning for the fingers to slip lower, possessing what she must offer. She feels the familiar, yet always unique, tightening of her muscles.

“Be still girl,” his tone invites no argument.

He pushes her down with the palm of his hand. She will not be permitted the smallest control.

Her flesh is a living canvass of light and shadows. Curves and lines provide natural pathways for his fingers to follow. She bites her lower lip in an attempt to obey his command. She must lie still, yet she must move. She must follow the imperative of his command, but she must obey the imperative of her need. Yin and yang.

He smiles, sensing her dilemma. It is the nature of the male’s power. Now he begins a deliberate arousal.

Circles and spirals of movement and control.

“Aiiee Master! Please?”

“Be quiet, slave.”

It is pleasant to touch this female. To explore the contours of her body, reading her reactions, taking control of her essence. His mind is relaxed, almost detached, as he discovers her limits and capacities. To control another, to have them yield their submission, one must first have control of one’s self. As he controls his own reactions, so he gains control over this slave.

She must be silent, yet she must scream.

His fingers follow seemingly random circular patterns over her body. At the breast, they trace a slow spiral that terminates with brush of leather over a hardened nipple. A brief tugging, the friction of leather against this too sensitive bead of skin. She draws a ragged breath.

He spreads his hand wide and encircles her throat. Slowly he applies pressure. Her breathing becomes laboured. His control is total. Her life is at his whim. She is nothing, only a tavern slut, a use girl. So near to death, this instant of life is brought into complete focus.

Her juices flow freely between her spread legs, exposing the intensity of her arousal.

The rich scenting of female perfumes the air. Tension

He breathes deeply, taking further pleasure from her essence. He presses down on her throat, still tightening his grip. She is both terrified and aroused. She can only do what she has been trained to do. She must obey her genetic coding.

She yields her submission.

He notes the changes. The arching of the back. The delicate hands gripping tightly on the chains. The legs spread wider, inviting and needful. Her parted lips beg for use.

He leans over and rapes a long kiss from her lips. As he does this, his free hand reaches down, trailing a path between her breasts, over the fine sheen of sweat on her belly. He feels vibrations deep in her throat as she struggles to scream. Her body is rigid in its tension.

Leather-clad fingers plunge through her slickness, probing her center. His hand twists in a cunning, erotic manner. He releases his hand from her throat; he ends the smothering kiss.

“Now, kajira.”

A primitive sound escapes her throat.

It is not a human noise. She has been reduced to a primal animal, without rationality. The scream is an ultimate expression, an exultation of her sexuality, defining her inner being. For an instant she is no longer slave, no longer kajira. For a single, infinitely long instant she attains a perfect moment of liberation, the freedom of the chains.

Slave orgasm.

There are no words to describe this mindless state. Waves of sensation pulse throughout her body. Muscles spasm, wrists twist in restraints, all control is lost. Somewhere a female is screaming.

“Master! Master! Master!”

Touch.

Distantly, she is aware he has mounted her, that he uses her in a quick rape. She flows into him, becoming his use thing. Still caught in the grips of orgasm, her body is a pleasing distraction from his work. She provides what he requires from her. He tenses.

Release.

Coda.

In a small alcove of a tavern, a use girl lies on the floor, chained to a ring on the wall, grateful for the rough blanket thrown when he was done.

In the distance, she can hear the wild scream of a tarn taking flight.

There is a sensation of floating, of being suspended in some strange other place. A place of balance and truth, a glorious zone of liberation where she has attained the perfection of her being. From this place, she hears her own voice, words flowing from her mouth, liquid and soft, like a distant river under the moon. “Thank you, Master. A girl thanks you.”

From far far away, the tarn screams again, its voice muted by the distance but still piercing as it soars still higher into the dark night sky. The beast’s cry is exultant, an joyful celebration of a perfect state of being.

Chained, yet floating free, the slave girl understands.
-----------

How does the submissive reflect the energy of the dominant? Part 2

Greetings all,

When I wrote my post on how the submissive reflects the dominant’s energy I concluded that I had not really answered the question I had been posed. I will try to do that now. Here is the original question again.

Could you please explain in more detail what you mean by the submissive reflecting the energy of the dominant? How does this happen, please? How can you tell that you have done so? Is it something that one does consciously? I'm afraid I fall into the second of the three groups you delineated so this does confuse me. I would appreciate it if you'd make this clearer for me.

I believe that by this stage I have made it clear that for an experienced dominant the submissive will naturally, and easily, reflect his energy. This can be done both in person or via cyberspace. Physical contact is not required for the process to occur. The well experienced submissive will not be surprised by her responses. Since she has had much experience in interacting with dominant males she is not concerned by what she is feeling, but rather flows effortlessly into the interaction if she wishes to, or can diplomatically withdraw if that is what is required.

No problem.

Too, if the dominant is well experienced, he will control the interaction. Even if the female is unaware of the fact, he will be in control. Again, there is no problem.

But what if he is not well experienced?

Here is what I believe. Nature calls to nature. Even when both the parties are unaware of their nature, still they will call to each other. Mistakes are often made (beginnings are dangerous), but still nature calls to nature.

The male dominant radiates his energy. What does this mean? I would suggest that it implies his approach to his environment. It is in the way he talks, he moves, he asserts himself. In every subtle action he takes, there is an undercurrent of dominance, even if he is unaware of that he is doing these things. For example, one girl once remarked to me that I had a particular way of walking into a room. I believe her words were, “You own the room.” I was never quite sure what she was talking about, since there is nothing I am conscious of doing when I enter a room, yet obviously she observed (and reacted!) to something I was doing.

Since I am not that unique, I would suggest that this manner of asserting oneself in ones environment is done by others.

A submissive female can not help but react to this sort of energy. It is her nature to react. What form does this reaction take? How is it made manifest? For the experienced submissive her reaction is deliberate and measured. Why? Because she understands what is happening. For the less experienced submissive (and the un-awakened submissive) the reaction can vary a great deal. But regardless of how it is done, she will end up doing more or less the same thing – reflecting his energy.

How does she reflect his energy? Here is the root of the question? What is the physical process that occurs? In other posts I have spoken of deliberate physical acts the female may perform to attract the male’s attention, but this is hardly an answer to the question.

After much consideration, I am not sure if I have an answer. I only know that, somehow, she does it. Perhaps this is the energy field that sandra has spoken of sensing. Perhaps it is sensory experience that goes beyond our acknowledged five senses. Perhaps it has something to do with scent. I really do not know. I only know that it is real, it occurs, and it can be detected.

Is it possible for the submissive to know she is reflecting a particular fellow’s energy? I am not sure, but certainly she will know the instant he turns his attention to her. She will sense it in her head, her heart, and her groin. She will be aware that something is happening internally, not only at an intellectual/emotional level, but at a physical level as well. Too, she will know it because when he turns his attention away from her, she will feel it at once, like the sun being hidden behind a cloud, or the needle being lifted off of a favourite record that has been playing.

She can have some measure of control over this experience, if she has been trained or mentored, but that does not mean she can turn it off. She is who she is. Nature may not be denied.

Which, I think, is a pretty good thing.

Be seeing you,

Mackenzie

Shibari - Personal Pics

Greetings all,

I enjoy shibari very much. I am still learning but I thought I would share some of my favourite shots. All of these pictures were taken by myself at different sessions, with different girls, over the last few years.

Here is a very early one, hardly shibari at all, but I find it quite evocative.



Next here is a shot of my second attempt at a suspension. It is rather obvious that I need a backdrop! Still, I was pleased with the results.



Here is my first attempt at binding two girls at once. This proved to be quite an interesting experience, for a variety of reasons.



During a session, it is possible to zone in on a single part of the experience which becomes quite intense. Here is a photo which I think illustrates such a moment.




Of course, shibari is also about the aftermath. Often, the most meaningful part of a session is at the end, when the female is released from the ropes bindings. Here is a shot which I think illustrates this point.


I will be attending a workshop by Lew Rubens later this week. Lew is a rather famous rigger and while his style is not shibari he does wonderful work and also is well known for his suspension work.

Be seeing you,

The arrival of a grouping of fans

Greetings all,

In response to the Submissive Reflective Energy post, a group of women who collectively left a detailed comment. I thought I would post my reply here, for more general consumption.

----------------
Greetings,

(Segue: I am pretty sure that this is the first time in my 30 odd years of network posting that I have ever addressed a comment to a Project).

>>Hello MacKenzie,<<

Segue: Just “Mackenzie” is fine. I never cap the K.

>> So fear not, we are not taking your word as gospel. We don’t take anyone’s word as gospel.<<

Excellent. This is a good ground rule, imo.

>> Although we find a great deal to recommend the validity of your observations (and more on that later), we don’t necessarily concur with your all of your opinions (indeed in several cases, our nonoccurrence is quite vehement).<<

You will not have been the first, or I suspect the last, to disagree with my opinions. Opinions are the spices of debate. Not everyone likes the same seasonings, eh?

>>Specifically, we’ve a bunch of QED geeks who, for instance, had to first formally prove that given 2 partners, consent and enjoyment, there are only 6 logical out of 16 possible permutations of sadomasochistic behavior before we could proceed with any type of meaningful discussion. You’ve participated in several similar discussions online, and unlike so many other contributors, seem to insist upon and make such precise distinctions and analysis yourself.<<

Yes, I do believe that it is difficult to have a meaningful debate unless everyone agrees on the terminology. Until such agreement is reached, it is almost impossible to engage anyone in meaningful discourse.

I would be interested in knowing more about these various combinations you have defined. Have they been formalized at all? Can they be shared outside the borders of your Project yet?

>>Second, based on the personality characteristics we’ve gleaned from your writings, we have identified you as an excellent manifestation of the actualized, or as you put it “well-developed”, dominant male.<<

LOL! I am pleased to know that I have been identified. Have you identified others as well?

>> we are, by dent of our collective professional and socio-economic backgrounds, quite clear re the persona of the actualized dominant male (and no, ladies, it’s not always a pretty picture).<<

Can you share any of your observations of this persona?

>>Finally, in our experience the dominant male rarely holds still for more than glancing observation. So while we may be able to properly identify dominant males and predict their behavior, the underlying rationale for their behavior is still largely mysterious to us. For example, the male concepts of “ownership” and “leadership by will” are a mite puzzling to us.<<

John Norman (of the Gor series) says that it is impossible for the female to understand certain masculine concepts just because of the differences in nature. For example, Norman feels that “honour” is a uniquely male concept. Kipling speaks of this in his poem about the nature of the female.

Of course, the reverse is true as well. Many concepts and ideas are unique to the female and are not easily understood by the male. In part, I believe this is due to social conditioning, but I also feel there is a large genetic component as well.

Therefore, it makes sense to me that you may find it a challenge to understand ideas such as “ownership.” There have been times when my girl has asked me, “What do you get out of this relationship?” From her perspective she feels that she is the primary beneficiary, and that the relationship is one-sided in terms of give and take. But this is a false perception, because she cannot appreciate the rich satisfaction derived from control and dominance. In the same manner I often have difficulty understanding what benefits the submissive derives from the relationship since it appears to me that I receive most of the benefits. Yin and yang, neh? Such is the often found irony of D/s.

>>You’ve placed yourself “under glass” with your blog and make a nice study specimen. We truly appreciate your allowing us a peek into your psyche.<<

My pleasure. Though I would remind you that perception is relative to the position of the observer. The view from under the glass is quite a bit different than looking in from the outside.

>> So, please take all this as a conscious absolution of responsibility and allow us our opinion. <<

So noted and accepted.

>> The only fruitful products of alpha stalking are subject familiarization and habitat identification, followed by a probabilistic increase of attracting an alpha due to increased alpha density. Otherwise, just sit still, act like prey (i.e. submissive), and nature will take its course. <<

In general I would agree. Though, speaking for myself, I tend not to do much hunting anymore. Perhaps it is age, or perhaps I simply have lost interest the whole stalk and capture process. Besides, it has been my experience that many females seem to go out of their way to put themselves in front of my path, and then, after a little while, are asking (or begging) for attention.

But that is another story.

>> (As an aside, we’ve found the female theme of “I want a dominate man” to be quite pervasive in all sectors of the sexuality info-world these days – it’s not exclusive to the D/s community and appears to be growing in overall popularity. <<

Again I would agree. I have noticed this among many of the young men I know. They are more comfortable being men, and taking charge of their environments. They have seen role models of men who can be strongly dominant without being abusive. It is interesting that you have noticed this as well.

>> We would all very much welcome the opportunity for additional correspondence with you - and you'd probably love to get our wordy asses off your blog. We’d love to hire you as a group information resource. Please give some thought to this proposition. Are private emails to your blog address acceptable from us? <<

First, you are not too wordy. Second, I look forward to your additional postings to my blog. Third, while I am not (at least at this point) available for hire, private emails are always acceptable to me. If you feel there is some matter not appropriate for the blog please feel free to email me directly.

Be seeing you,

Fictional Writings - Destiny

Greetings all,

From time to time I will be posting short fictional pieces I have written. Most of these will have been published in other places, however since I have closed my web site down I have been getting some requests for some of the works that were available there.

This piece was never properly named. I have left the title "Destiny" since it is the best fit so far, but I am always open to suggestions.

While it is not my intent for this blog to become a showcase for my longer fictional works, hopefully the occasional shorter pieces will be welcomed by the readers.

Be seeing you,

------

Destiny
Copyright 2004, 2005 Mackenzie Cross
All rights reserved

There will come a day when you ask permission to call me Sir, to offer the formality of an honorific as a token of awakening needs.

I will not grant it.

There will come a day when you yearn to kneel at my feet, to spread your knees apart in an impulsive acknowledgment of the emerging power flow between us, my dominance to your submission, not yet spoken, but still tangible and real.

I shall not allow it.

There will come a day when you request bondage, a taunting desire to feel ropes tightly binding your body, enforcing my will upon your flesh, keeping you ready for my use. You will imagine yourself held captive, a waiting receptacle for my darkness, the coils biting as you twist, a harbinger of the pain of my whips or blacker devices. The fantasy will obsess you; an addiction of fear and arousal.

I shall refuse your request.

There will come a day when you offer me your body for my delight and pleasure. You will be aroused and anxious for rough handling. The tension of denied releases will turn your skin into an electric field of hunger, radiating sex. Deep, throbbing pulses will travel from cunt to brain, pounding a primal rhythm, preventing rational thought. Your scent will permeate the room and you will be unable to control the quickness of your breath. Mind and body will open to me, and you shall silently pray I will be moved by your invitation.

I shall not accept it.

There will come a day you will find yourself naked and vulnerable, lying on the floor, your needs fully upon you, crazed and out of control. You shall slowly crawl the distance between us, sobbing with the intensity of the moment, caught in a vise between the jaws of submission and fear, helpless to do anything but move closer. You will belly to my feet and your tears will fall softly on my shoes.

Then you shall beg.

You will beg your submission and you will beg my control. You will plead your desire, your needs, and your arousal. You will offer me anything I ask of you, allow any use I would have for you, in any manner, at any time. The sounds from your throat will expose your inner fear and desperation. Fearful of my rejection yet desperate in your cravings, you will plead to be my slut and beg to be my slave. A terrible tension will fill you as you lie there, praying for my acceptance, terrified of the consequences.

Then, and only then, shall I grant you your destiny.
-------

Pointers and finders

Greetings all,

A number of things have happened since my last bit of blogging. So, before I get into the heavy stuff, I thought I might just bring things up to date.

There was a small amount of debate recently with a woman concerning my level of knowledge and experience, and if I was doing more damage than harm in promoting my point of view. Those interested can read about it here.

Also, at the encouragement of others I will be posting some of my fictional writings here on the blog, as well as some photos of my recent (and not so recent) shibari (and bondage) sessions.

Finally, what I would really like to get around to doing today is write the second part of the reflecting energy post. Hopefully I will get around to it today.

In other news, I have been considering the possibility of developing some workshops, or seminars, which will be D/s themed. Before I can start, I will need to decide the target demographic for these sessions. As I see it, there are two possible audiences. The first would be rank beginners who are simply looking to find out what D/s is all about, and how to determine if it is for them. The second group would be those who are more experienced and who are looking for a discussion on more advanced topics. My motivation in trying to do these sessions would not be to teach people how to play, or scene, but rather how to incorporate D/s into a person's lifestyle.

It is good to have dreams and projects, eh?

Be seeing you,