The psychology of submission and power

Greetings all,

In response to my article on Rules and Rituals I received the following comment from amber juel.

>I had a conversation with a male friend today regarding the differences in our approach to bondage. His is casual, light-hearted and teasing while I get more benefit from formality and the psychological aspect, but the end result is the same for both - intensity and release.

In any event, the conversation reminded me of this...

Rituals provide the vocabulary for expression of devotion and eroticisation of the mundane. They must be crafted with care, designed with the psychology of submission and power in mind, and enforced with dedication.

It would be interesting if you could speak more about the psychology of submission and power.<

As you know I believe that a female’s submissive nature is greatly determined by genetics. IOW – it is encoded into the very cells of her body through many years of evolution. Of course, social conditioning has an important to play in this process, different cultures tend to promote or suppress these natures to a lesser or greater extent. However, I do believe that the natural tendency to submit is wired in from birth.

Therefore, the psychology of submission is, to me, not about how one “becomes” submissive (since that is not really possible) but rather how one can express one’s submissive nature. It is about how the mind processes these natural urges, how it comes to terms with them, and how it displays them. When poorly handled the female may behave in maladaptive ways which will permeate every aspect of her daily life. She may find herself feeling stress, unable to cope, eating too much (or not enough), sleeping too much (or not enough), etc. IOW – because they have no way to express their inner nature and the power associated with that nature they tend to struggle.

Submission is also an expression of power. Some equate the loss of control with the loss of power, but I would disagree. The submissives I know have often told me of how energized and powerful they feel when they are given an opportunity to explore and express their nature. In this sense, power can be equated to energy. So, even though they are controlled, still they are energized. This is a curious paradox, that a female when she is serving on her knees should feel a strong rush of energy coursing through her body. This energy can often have an erotic (sexual) component, but that does not always have to be the case. The performance of an act of service to another is often enough to give this charge of energy.

I am told it can be powerful indeed.

So, with respect to psychology of submission and power I would say that by coming to terms with one’s nature, and finding a place of balance from which to serve, a female can enjoy a heightened level of energy (power) that would normally not be accessible to her through any other means.

I trust this has answered your question.

Be seeing you,