Greetings,
Hollywood has rarely been kind to the BDSM lifestyle. Either it is portrayed in a comic manner, normally as a farce, or it is pornographic. Some of the later category have not been badly done. Fashionistas starring Bella Donna and Rocco comes to mind. Still while the viewer may find plenty of material to stimulate, there is not much there to educate. IOW - if someone, and by this I mean a vanilla someone, was trying to get a better understanding of how the power dynamic works, they will be disappointed.
Some movies have tried to approach the topic is a somewhat more dramatic approach. The classic 9 1/2 Weeks come to mind, as does the rather less well known Pet. While I enjoyed elements of both these movies, and others, too often they end in tragedy. The underlying message always seems to be that if you are going to follow the path to perversion then you are doomed to suffer. Hollywood (which is to say the vanilla world in general) refuses to consider that the pairing of a sadist and a masochist can have a happy ending.
A number of years ago I had the opportunity to see a movie called Secretary, starring James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal. Some of you may know Spader from his award winning role in Boston Legal (a show I recommend to all). Curiously, the character he plays in Secretary seems to have been the seminal model for the character of Allen Shore he played one year later in Boston Legal.
IAE - last night I had the opportunity to watch the movie again, and I must admit I was even more impressed than the first time I watched it. I do not wish to give the plot away for those who have not seen it but the story revolves around a Dominant-sadist and a Submissive-masochist, finding each other and coming to terms with their own nature. The subject matter is handled with a rare amount of maturity, sensitivity, and imo a real desire to communicate to the vanilla world a little bit about what makes Dominants and Submmissives tick.
After watching the movie one of my girls (who was seeing it for the first time) went out and did a fair amount of research as to the different reviews by various critics. While it received high praise as a movie, most of the time it was fairly obvious that the reviewers didn't really understand what the movie was about. IOW - they liked the way the story was told, but didn't get the message, and in some cases chose to completely misinterpret what it was about.
Curiously, the thing that most of the reviewers objected to was the fact that the movie has a happy ending. It seemed to bother them that "perverts" were allowed to be happy.
IAE - I certainly recommend getting a hold of a copy of the movie if you can. Its available as a torrent download, or I am sure you can find copies of the DVD around. I would be most interested in other people's impressions.
Speaking of movies, I am anxiously awaiting the release of the recent documentary called Graphic Sexual Torture, about the famous (or infamous) Insex web site, and its creator pd. It has been getting rave reviews on the film festival circuit. Anyone seen it yet?
Be seeing you,
5 comments:
Greetings, Mr. Cross
I had the good fortune of watching The Secretary several years ago with a friend and was also very surprised with the way the subject matter was handled. I grew to care for the characters and wanted them to find happiness. But I was even more impressed with the understanding and compassion that was portrayed regarding the anguish both the characters went through on their journey toward accepting themselves.
It was really very well done.
I can certainly see why someone not familiar with the D/s dynamic might not catch the nuances, but they were definitely evident to me. Which, I think, is why it was so successful as a movie. It had something for the "vanillas" [I really don't like that reference. Vanilla is actually quite a complex flavor made up of several hundred compounds. =)] as well as the BDSM community.
My thoughts on why some people didn't like the ending is that they are just not educated on the subject yet. The Secretary did an excellent job of starting the education, but it must continue, and the only way to do that is to not make the subject so taboo or a joke. Even though D/s is not technically about "sex", it is very sexually charged and Americans, in particular, are very uncomfortable talking about sex.
Once we collectively get our PC heads out of our PC asses, then some real strides can be made. I do see some progress and that is a good thing.
Thanks for reminding me of this movie. It's time to see it again.
Fondly,
amber Juel
Dear Mr Cross:
First of all: welcome back.
I was only thinking about 'Secretary' the other day, having already seen it twice. I thought how sensitively played it was and in fact, how much the boss reminded me of my mentor. There are many wonderfully subtle moments in the movie and certainly the best part for me is that we leave them, knowing how fulfilled they will be together.
I know critics of the movie have not appreciated the girl self-harming at the beginning, but for me it illustrated how much her nature called for this kind of relationship and how his quiet insistence that she stop, was enough. The 'therapy' he provided her was not available to her in any other way, demonstrating the power of these relationships to create peace of mind and happiness.
Greetings amber,
Thank you for your comments.
I agree that the topic was well handled. However I am not really sure how easily those not in the lifestyle would be able to understand what was being shown. At least most of the movie reviews I read seemed to show a remarkable lack of understanding.
BTW - I also agree with you about the term "vanilla". However, it is so pervasive I think we will have to accept it.
Vesta: Thank you for your comments. I agree with your pick of the most significant moment in the film. It shows that while all the therapy in the world could not help here, a single sentence from a Dominant was enough to end her pathology. This makes perfect sense to me.
Be seeing you,
MC
welcome back. it is a pleasure to be reading you again.
i think that for those of us that know and understand the depth of a D/s relationship, the power of his being able to stop her self- harm is awesome. i, too, can attest that i successfully quit smoking, obeying a demand from my Master. it was much easier for me than it had been on the numerous attempts i had previously made on my own.
however, people whose outlook is more vanilla in nature, don't necessarily see it that way. from comments i have heard from people, the movie reinforced the notion that only those with mental issues would engage in bdsm. in that sense the movie portrayed the bdsm world in a bad light. had she been a strong, stable, yet submissive, career woman, that stereotype would not have had a foothold. however the movie portrayed her as a self-harming and meek, which can easily be interpreted as unstable, and thus giving a socially acceptable "reason" for her "deviance".
but as one that can appreciate the nuances of the movie, i will say that my favorite part of the movie is the end, when given a direction to stay put, hands on the table, she does so, through all the difficulty and persuasions, until he came back.
rose
Greetings rose,
I fully agree. Perhaps my single greatest objection to the movie was the fact that Lee Holloway is shown as a girl with a pathology that can only be "cured" via the lifestyle. OTOH - if the world as whole was not really ready for a D/s film with a happy ending, imagine how much less they would have been ready to accept that normal, sane, people would wish to engage in it, in particular since almost all of the other movies that have dealt with the topic have ended as tragedies.
Ah well, on the plus side it would appear that there is still a reason for my blog, eh?
Thank you for your comment. It was good to hear from you.
Be seeing you,
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